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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26255776">Me and Yuu Every Step of the Way</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tinybean23/pseuds/Tinybean23'>Tinybean23</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, AsaNoya - Freeform, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, My First Fanfic, Not Beta Read, Panic Attacks</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-02</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 03:35:43</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>8,006</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26255776</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tinybean23/pseuds/Tinybean23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>In a world where everyone has some sexual attraction Azumane Asahi has always thought of himself as asexual, and those feelings only strengthening when he got together with his crush Nishinoya Yuu. However after a while Asahi starts feeling odd around Noya, and after a study night leaves him questioning if he truly is ace.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Azumane Asahi/Nishinoya Yuu, Minor or Background Relationship(s), Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>59</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>1. I Don't Know What to Do</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p><em> I never thought these feelings were possible... </em>Ashai sighed as he tried to focus on the words of his professor. He began to fidget as he recounted last night's events. Nishinoya had come over for help with his work as he didn’t feel like putting up with Ennoshita’s tutoring. Things had been going smoothly until Noya decided he was bored and would rather do something else than his work. He had crawled onto Ashai’s lap with a smirk silencing any attempts of protest with a peck on the lips. </p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Cmon Asahi, we've studied long enough right? Can’t we take a short break?” Noya whispered wrapping his hands around Asahi’s neck. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Yuu...You came here to study...We need to-” if Asahi really had wanted to, he could easily push him away, and Noya in turn wouldn’t push further. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Please Azumane?” He gave his best pleading eyes, planting another peck on his lips making Asahi’s head all fuzzy. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “What am I going to do with you?” Asahi sighed fondly, wrapping his arms around Noya’s waist. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Make out with me obviously!” Nishinoya laughed before crashing his lips onto his own. </em>
</p><p> </p><p><em> That’s when </em> <b> <em>it</em> </b> <em> happened. He could feel something settle into the pit of his stomach as heat began to spread like wildfire. The kisses between them growing more intense as his mind began to cloud over with an foriegn feeling. He and Noya had made out plenty of times, but now he could feel his blood rushing and desperate feelings to bring their bodies closer. He could feel every sigh of content, something rising inside of him threatening to burst. Noya broke the kiss with a yelp as Asahi’s eyes fluttered open realizing his hands were traveling a little too south on his back. Realizing what he’d done he slid Noya off his lap and got down on his knees face red with embarrassment.  </em></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “I am so sorry Nishinoya I have no idea what came over me!” He had his face to the floor refusing to look at Noya for fear that he made him uncomfortable. </em>
</p><p> </p><p><em> “It’s alright Asahi! I didn’t mind at all, I liked the way your hands wandered.” Reaching out to lift his face from the floor, he cocked his head “I thought </em> <b> <em>you</em> </b> <em> weren’t into that kind of stuff.” </em></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “I’m not!” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “There’s no need to be embarrassed Azumane, it's normal to feel this way~” Noya laughed as Asahi hid his face. Shifting, Noya spoke in an usually serious tone “I’m just teasing, you know that right? I know you’re asexual, we talked about this before we got together. I hope I wasn’t pressuring you with my advances, I told you that all you need to say is no.”  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Never Yuu” He bent down to intertwine their fingers, “that was all me, I just don’t know what came over me. I never had those feelings before...would it be alright if we went back to studying? I don’t think I can handle continuing”  </em>
</p><p> </p><p><em> “Don’t apologize for that Azumane! How many times do I have to tell you that I understand you have different feelings.” He could feel Noya plant a kiss on his knuckles  “All you need to do is say </em> <b> <em>no</em> </b> <em> okay? Let's get back into this torture” He picked up the pencil and began to write down again. </em></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Thanks Yuu…” Asahi smiled but still felt confused as to the high he had just experienced, attempting to shake off the feeling. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>Which leads to the predicament he was feeling, he couldn’t get last night's events out of his head. The way Yuu fit perfectly in his lap, the way Yuu’s lips felt against his own, the way Yuu’s voice sighed against his lips, and <em>Yuu. Yuu. </em><b><em>Yuu.</em></b> Yuu infected his mind and allowed no room for anything else. Running his hands through his messy hair he felt that same fire spread over his body, the sensations rising out of him and any hope of being able to concentrate on the lesson long gone. He felt his chest become tight and breathing impossible as he recalled how <b><em>wonderful</em></b> Yuu felt last night. <em>I don’t understand, I thought I was Asexual my whole life, I’ve never felt like this for </em><b><em>anyone</em></b><em>…not even </em><b><em>Yuu </em></b><em>when we first began to date. Am I just hungry? I need to talk to someone about this...</em>Letting out a sigh he busied himself with drawing in his notebook knowing he wouldn’t be able to do much else. <em>I’ll ask Sugawara for the notes...oh, maybe I can talk to him about my issue. There isn’t anyone else besides him, Daichi, and Noya I’d feel comfortable discussing </em><b><em>this</em></b><em> about. </em>Waiting anxiously for class to be over he could feel the heat be replaced with occasional chills down his spine.</p><p>Minutes felt like hours as the bell had <em> finally </em> rung signaling the end of the period as the professor dismissed them. Approaching Sugawara he could feel the drumming in his ears, sweaty palms, and anxiety spiking into his chest. <em> This is a bad idea. Maybe I’m just overreacting and I’m not feeling what I think I’m feeling. Yeah, I was probably a little too obsessed about Yuu, I do adore everything about him. I’m just confusing my feelings, maybe I’m touched starved? I am overreacting. I should just keep it to myself... </em>Fortunately or unfortunately Sugawara had felt a presence walking towards him and turned to see Asahi fidgeting and looking disheveled. </p><p> </p><p>“Asahi-san?”</p><p> </p><p>“Sugawara-san?” His voice cracked, <em> Oh crap he noticed me… </em></p><p> </p><p>“What’s up?” Suga was packing up but faced Asahi to let him know he was listening.</p><p> </p><p>“Um...Do...Do you think you can let me borrow your notes? I-I...I wasn’t paying attention”</p><p> </p><p>“Of course Asahi” Suga pursed his lips, a knowing look spreading across his face “But I trust you to tell me what's <em> truly </em> going on Asahi-san”. He reached for his bag fligning it over his shoulders, “Should I tell Daichi to wait or do you want it to be just us?”</p><p> </p><p>“I...do you mind?” He fiddled with his hands attempting to calm himself down</p><p> </p><p>“Not at all, whatever it is must be important. Come let’s go to the roof, most students aren’t there” Sending a text to who he presumed to be Daichi they took their lunches and soon found a spot to sit down.</p><p> </p><p>Suga pulled out the notes allowing Asahi to begin scribbling down whatever he had missed. </p><p> </p><p>“So Asahi-san”</p><p> </p><p>“Uh…yeah Suga-san?”</p><p> </p><p>“What’s the real reason you wanted to talk to me?’</p><p> </p><p>Asahi choked turning bright red as he frantically tried to erase the line he had made along his notebook. “Suga you can't just say that out of nowhere!”</p><p> </p><p>“Whatever it is has you worked up, so what is it? I don’t mean to rush you but we don't have all day and lunch will end soon if you don’t hurry up” Suga reprimanded </p><p> </p><p>“Sorry Suga….it’s just very hard for me to admit it” Scratching his face he attempted to calm his nerves by focusing on the letters he was trying to copy. Suga just hummed in response resting his arms on his legs waiting for him to continue. “I..I told you I was Asexual right?” He felt the anxiety prickling his skin letting out a shaky sigh.</p><p> </p><p>“Of course Asahi, and I hope you know the whole team and I support you. You are valid in not feeling any kind of sexual attraction towards anyone” Asahi sighed a little causing Suga to lower his voice “Did someone try to tell you that you <b> <em>can’t</em> </b> be that? I swear…I’ll send Tanaka on them” </p><p> </p><p>“N-NO SUGA!” Asahi shook his head frantically, “It’s not that Suga! Well, I don’t know…”</p><p> </p><p>“Asahi-san?” He felt a squeeze on his shoulder, “You can tell me anything I won’t judge, you know that right?” He nodded. “Then?”</p><p> </p><p>“I…” Letting out a shaky sigh he hadn’t realized he had been holding looked at the ground. “It’s just that last night me and...I mean Yuu...NOYA and I were making out and I…”</p><p> </p><p>“Did Nishinoya pressure you to do something you didn’t want to?” Suga’s voice got dangerously low. “Cause if he did I will- “</p><p> </p><p>“NEVER! Nishinoya would never do anything like that!” Asahi quickly shot up attempting to calm down Suga.</p><p> </p><p>“Are you sure?” He eyed him suspiciously as Asahi swallowed a lump in his throat.</p><p> </p><p>“O-Of course Suga! You know he has been nothing but respectful towards my boundaries, a-and understands what I can and c-cannot do!” </p><p> </p><p>“Alright...then?”</p><p> </p><p>“I-...how do you know if…” He could feel his face burning as the feelings came crashing in waves. “Suga...how did you know…” He coughed a little.</p><p> </p><p>“Asahi?”</p><p> </p><p>“I-...Suga how do you know...what’s it like...to feel unholy?” Asahi was gripping his pants so tightly his knuckles began to turn white. His whole body was on fire and surprised that Suga couldn’t feel the heat radiating off of him.</p><p> </p><p>“Feel unholy?” Suga attempted to bite down the laughter “A-Asahi is everything alright?”</p><p> </p><p>“Last night!” Asahi began to mumble “Nishinoya and I were making out as usual a-and normally I don’t feel that much of anything. B-but last night I felt...I felt so b-bizarre! I..normally” taking a breath in he continued '' When we make out it’s just kissing and light grinding cause I-I don't mind and it feels pleasant! L-Last night though my h-hands started wandering and my head was a mess! I was...everything felt so right! A-and before I knew it my hand went t-to low on Noya’s back and…” Asahi heard a chuckle escape before tensing up again.</p><p> </p><p>“Asahi you know it's okay to feel aroused by the actions of a person right? That doesn’t make you any less valid, as asexual do experience feeling horny. It’s just they are not attracted to anyone in <em> that </em> manner in normal circumstances.” Suga rubbed Asahi’s back attempting to soothe him down. “It’s not like you are looking at Noya everyday and thinking about how you wanna-”</p><p> </p><p>“SUGA-SAN!” Asahi buried his face into his hands as Suga let out a light hearted chuckle before returning to a gentle smile. He attempted to calm his racing heart, looking everywhere but Suga. </p><p> </p><p>“Unless...have you started to feel attracted to Noya in that manner?” Looking up he could see Suga’s eyes widen as he cocked his head to the side.”Asahi?”</p><p> </p><p>“...” Feeling the flush rush to his cheeks he sighed as he scratched his cheek again.” I...I don’t remember when exactly it started. All I know is I’ve been feeling odd when I see Noya when we change or when he wraps his legs around my waist when he jumps for a hug..I never experienced anything like <em> that </em>before...I don’t know what it feels like except from reading or movies. I never experienced a feeling like that...so….I-I wanna make sure what I think...what I have been feeling is… is that...the unholy!” He could feel breathing become intense as waves of Yuu came into his mind over and over again. The way his eyelashes fluttered shut when he grabbed his hips, the way Yuu would sneak not so hidden heated looks when they changed, the smile he shone when he triumphed, and the way Yuu loved to tangle his fingers into his locks of brown hair when lips refused to part. It was intoxicating in a way that Noya’s lip biting when he’s thinking became too much for the glass hearted man to handle. “I’m so confused! Am I just overreacting Sugawara?”</p><p> </p><p>“Asahi breathe. You are getting worked up again.” Reaching for his hand, Suga began to draw circles around his knuckles. “It’s okay, you’re not overreacting despite how you normally are with these...things.” Suga swallowed down and attempted to soothe the gentle giant. “I may not be able to say what this makes you...but in regards to the first question you asked me...Asahi.” Taking both of his hands into his own.”Asahi...if the speech you just gave me and the look you had on while thinking about Noya...Asahi you are feeling...the unholy as you put it.” Squeezing his hands to a breathing rhythm to help Asahi calm further. “It’s okay to feel this way you know?”</p><p> </p><p>“What's Noya gonna think?”</p><p> </p><p>“Hm?”</p><p> </p><p>“How...How will Noya react to this? C-Can I… can I even tell him?” Asahi felt tears well up from an unknown source. “ Will...will he be mad? I...I technically lied to him I-”</p><p> </p><p>“You didn’t!” Suga quickly pulled him in for a hug rubbing his back, feeling him tremble.</p><p> </p><p>“B-but I said I was Asexual! That I..I couldn’t feel that kind of attraction, all the times we’ve made out and he g-grinded on me…will he think I wasn’t being honest? W-will he say I was being a perv when I did those things? Am I a perv? Oh God Suga I-”</p><p> </p><p>“Asahi shhhh” He could feel Suga begin to rub circles on his back, humming a simple lullaby to get him to focus. “Asahi, Noya loves and trusts you. You know he wouldn’t hold it against you right?”</p><p> </p><p>“B-but Suga-san I-”</p><p> </p><p>“Asahi!” Suga pulled away and looked straight at Asahi.”We all get confused about what we are, and what we are not. Did you or did you not say you only felt this way recently?”</p><p> </p><p>“W-Well yeah but what does this have to do-?”</p><p> </p><p>“Then that means you <b> <em>weren’t lying</em> </b> . Asahi everyone knows how much you care and adore Noya, and he knows that better than anyone. Anyone with ears can hear the love in his voice whenever he talks about <b> <em>you</em> </b>. I don’t know what these feelings mean, but I know about one thing...just because you feel it now doesn’t mean you were lying about your sexuality. Now stop telling yourself that because it’s not true.” Suga pulls him back into an even tighter hug as tears begin to roll down his face feeling overwhelmed.</p><p> </p><p>“Thank you Suga…”</p><p> </p><p>“Don’t thank me, we are here for you no matter what. What this means for your sexuality, and your relationship I’m not sure...but I do know Asahi” Squeezing him once more for reassurance “No matter what happens we <b> <em>all love you</em> </b> and that’s not gonna change. You need to talk to Noya about all of this since communication is key.” Pulling away Suga reached for a napkin in his bag handing it to Asahi “It might be scary but Noya will always listen when it comes to something important. You can do it.”</p><p> </p><p>“Thank you…”</p><p> </p><p>“What did I say about thanking me Asahi?”</p><p> </p><p>“I-I….I’m sorry”</p><p> </p><p>“Don’t apologize either!” Suga said lightly smacking the back of his head letting a fond chuckle escape his lips. “Although I don’t want to leave, I promise... we have to get to class. You don’t have to come to practice today if you still feel this anxious, I can just tell them you weren’t feeling well.”</p><p> </p><p>“I...I understand...thanks Suga-san”</p><p> </p><p>“Anytime Asahi, I hope you feel better.”</p><p> </p><p>With that the pair unceremoniously packed up their belongings and walked to class. You could have asked him what he had for lunch, what was his current class, or even his name but he wouldn’t be able to respond back. His mind was on auto pilot as he thought back to the very start of his and Yuu’s relationship. Back when Noya had spontaneously proclaimed his feelings for him as they walked home from practice. The colors of the sunset painting the sky in shades of reds and blues with purple clouds dancing across as the orange rays dyed Noya’s skin. If he could go back he’d want to take a picture of that moment and carry it with him forever. The look of determination in Noya’s voice, the way the blush dusted his cheeks, the way his eyes pierced through him and beneath the gaze all Asahi could feel was loved. There went his mind again thinking about Yuu; about Yuu’s zest for life allowing him to enchant others with his infectious energy. About Yuu’s tenacity making him a force of nature thundering through with unmatched ferocity. About Yuu’s courage to overcome anything in his way, keeping the words of his grandfather to live with no regrets. Yuu who his mind constantly reaches for in this time of unease that it has no room for anything else. Breathing in an attempt to banish the feelings he felt a sigh escape his lips. Gazing into the distance he remembered the response he had given Yuu.</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> For a moment time stopped as he stared at Noya with wide eyes, as he looked ethereal with the sun disappearing. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Noya….” Feeling his head spin, throat closing, lungs forgetting to breathe, and heart threatening to explode out of his chest. He could feel it all threaten to overflow as the stars that began to occupy the sky. “I-I….I can’t” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “What? Asahi do you not feel the same way?” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “N-NO! I mean It’s not like that! Wait… I do too. I like you so much Noya.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Asahi, are you being insecure again? How many times do I have to say it, you are wonderful-” Noya began walking towards him as the sun was barely visible on the horizon. He began to rant on everything he adored about him, the whole time Asahi could only focus on the force behind the words as Noya practically shouted at him. </em>
</p><p> </p><p><em> “Noya, I can’t go out with you! It...I-I...I’m asexual Nishinoya, I can’t…” Asahi let out a sigh, “I could never go </em> <b> <em>that </em> </b> <em> far with you….I’m not...I can’t give you everything a relationship needs.” </em></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Are you kidding me?” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “I’m sorry Noya, I’ll just go if you want me to, I just…” </em>
</p><p> </p><p><em> “ </em> <b> <em>Don’t</em> </b> <em> . Asahi, I know you are Asexual and don’t want to ever have intercourse with anyone; including me. </em> <b> <em>I don’t care about that</em> </b> <em> .” He hissed between his teeth as Asahi froze on the spot.”Do you think that all I would ever want in a relationship is sex?” </em></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Nishinoya that’s not what I meant...I” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Listen to me Asahi, and listen well, I don’t care if we never do anything sexual! All I want is for you to stay by my side, for all the highs and baggage that comes with it! I would never have asked you to be my boyfriend if I didn’t feel like I couldn’t handle it.” Crossing his arms with the piercing gaze returning,” Sex isn’t neccessary for a relationship, it never has been and never will be. All I want is to wake up and say that my boyfriend is Asahi Azumane, to love you and be loved in return.” Nishinoya stood in front of him as a breeze passed by, reaching for his hands.”We can figure it out together, that's what being in a relationship means. Azumane...if you feel the same, give us a chance, I’m ready whenever you are.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> Asahi pulled Noya in for a hug, feeling tears leave his eyes, “of course Yuu....It’s all I’ve ever wanted.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p><em> “Then be my boyfriend, let’s figure it out </em> <b> <em>together</em> </b> <em> . Remember what I promised when you came back to the team? I have your back so trust me and keep moving forward.” </em></p><p> </p><p>The bell rang, snapping Asahi out of another trance that distracted him for God knows how long. Shoving his belongings into his bag he walked to his next class just wishing for the day to end. Thoughts of Yuu refused to leave as a warm feeling came over him like the bear hugs Noya loved. Yuu, who, when Asahi is feeling down will do whatever it takes to make him feel better. Yuu, who, when they were first testing the waters, slowed down to walk with him. Yuu, who, when he gets the chance reminds him that he loves him no matter what. Yuu who knows him better than anyone else. Yuu who saw him at his worst and at his best, loving him through it all. Nishinoya Yuu who drove him absolutely mad with all his mischief and teasing. Yuu with his go with the flow attitude accepting cards he’s dealt with little trouble. He loves him and is confident that Noya loves him right back. Feeling tension in his body finally relax he busied himself again copying the notes he saw. <em> That still doesn’t explain those feelings in me...Suga’s right, one way or another I have to talk to Nishinoya. Although I may feel nervous, we did promise to find things out together as a pair. He will have my back no matter what happens. I trust you Noya.... </em></p><p> </p><p>Time dragged on as he tried to take down notes as his mind began to wonder once more. <em> What if everything backfires? What if he no longer wants to be with me? What if he breaks up with me cause I lied to him? I never meant to feel this way. I didn’t even know I could ever feel this way towards anyone! I never meant to say I’m asexual only to discover that may not be the case. I... </em> Closing his eyes he glanced at his phone turning on to check the time, <em> 20 more minutes till it ends . </em> Looking at his lockscreen he could see Yuu smiling brightly at the camera while wearing the ace’s jersey. He could feel the oh so tortuous sparks travel through him. The way he looked with his hair down, the mischievous glint in his eyes as he posed seductively making fireworks burn in his stomach. What he thought was once a cute photo of his troublemaker of his love now reminded him of how much Asahi wanted him... Shutting his eyes he recalled the story behind the picture.</p><p> </p><p><em> It was after they had gone out on a date when it rained unexpectedly and they got soaked. After apologizing profusely for not checking the weather as he asked </em> <em>Noya to shower before he got sick. It was only then he realized that his clothes were still wet from the rain. Anxious as ever, Asahi ran to his room in an attempt to find anything that could possibly fit, but being much taller made it impossible. He was still searching when Noya came into his room with a towel wrapped around his waist as he leaned against the door smiling wickedly.</em></p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Azu why is your room a mess? Did you not expect me to come over? ” He cocked an eyebrow as he walked into the room. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Noya! What...how long have you been there?” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Azu you can call me Yuu, we are dating” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Sorry No- I mean Yuu. I was just trying to look for something you could wear while your clothes dry.” He smiled sheepishly scratching his face letting his gaze fall on Noya. He looked so different when his hair wasn’t spiked up in gel. “Sorry for the mess, I just can’t find anything.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Are you sure about that Azumane?” He could tell that he was planning something with the way his voice dipped slightly. The way he said his full name would haunt him in ways even Noya couldn’t dream of. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Yuu whatever it is you’re planning, please no.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “It’s nothing bad!” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “You always say that before doing something that gets you and Tanaka in trouble.” Sighing fondly as he could see the glint in Noyas chocolate eyes as something caught his eye. Before he could react to hold him back, he grabbed his jersey from the floor holding it up like a trophy. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “I could wear this!” As his signature grin spread across his face. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Noya but that’s too big for you!” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “I don’t see that as an issue, and it's not like I have anything else to wear.” He laughed leaving the room with the Aces jersey in hand. </em>
</p><p>
  <em> Asahi had been left a blushing mess when he saw Noya walk into the room with his jersey on. As suspected it was too big for him but that only made it more charming as his hair was down, chocolate eyes brightening upon seeing Asahi’s reaction.  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “You like what you see?” Wiggling his eyebrows as he threw his head back for extra measure. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Yuu--” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “It’s not my fault I’m irresistible.” Laughter bubbling up as he walked proudly in the shirt. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “You’re gonna be the death of me!” Shaking his head he pulled Noya in for a hug, “I wish I could keep this moment with me. You’re too beautiful Yuu, it’s unfair. ” He could feel the heat rising to his cheeks as he let the words escape his mouth. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “You could take a picture of me if you want to, that way you can always remember your attractive boyfriend wherever you go.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “What...?” He looked into Noya’s eyes feeling his widen. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “I said you could take a picture of me you dork….only if you want to tho. I don’t mind posing for my boyfriend.” Letting the boyfriend part drag on a little too long he winked at him, and he could have sworn his soul left his body as he remembered the playful look. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Yuu! Don’t say things like that if you don’t...I mean I wouldn’t be opposed.” Looking away from him choosing to focus on the floor. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Then what are you waiting for? Take a picture then” Noya walked across the room leaning against a chair. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Are you sure you’re okay with it Noya? I don’t want you to feel forced or something.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Azumane…”He could feel his boyfriend roll his eyes without having to look at his face, ”Would I ask if I felt bothered by it? You know I would tell you if I was uncomfortable, when am I ever dishonest or one to hold back?” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “I…” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “What was that?” He could sense the impatience coming from Noya as he crossed his arms. </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Never Yuu. You always speak your mind no matter what” Holding up his phone camera making sure all of Noya was in the shot, “It’s one of the many things I love about you.” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “You love me Azumane?” Clutching his chest and putting a hand on his forehead, “What a scandal! Tell me, what else do you love about me?” </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Yuu please!”  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “I love you too Asahi~”  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em> “Yuu!” </em>
</p><p><br/>Looking back at the lock screen he can feel the love radiating off of it as the I love you too rang in his mind. <em> Noya loves me, he loves me as I love him. I...he will be honest with me at the very least no matter what changes. Noya promised to have my back, he always is there. I can’t back out, I have to let him know how I feel... </em>He knows that this is so uncharacteristic of him, but when it came to something as important as this, he had no choice but to be bold. Feeling daring he texted Noya to meet him in front of school before he lost his resolve. He needed to talk with Yuu as soon as possible before the confidence in his body left. Class was over shortly after and texting Suga that he wouldn’t be going to practice. He sprinted to the entrance of the school restlessness spreading knowing he’d soon be able to bury himself into Noyas arms and find out what this meant for them.</p>
  </div></div>
<a name="section0002"><h2>2. We Always Figure it Out in the End</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Notes for the Chapter:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>According to some Tiger Eye Stones are used to help soothe anxiety, help with self esteem issues, a symbol of protection, and can dispel fear. They can come in shades ranging from golden yellow to red; including brown with black stripes across it. ALSO: For maximum effect listen to dusk till dawn by zayn &amp; sia (slowed + reverb) I was jamming to this song in the background during some scene since it fit the mood. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0SWr6fBwBrU&amp;list=RD0SWr6fBwBrU&amp;start_radio=1 (this is the version I listened to)</p></blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>First thing he saw was Noya’s spiky hair standing proudly much like the libero himself. Choruses of apologies leaving his lips when students lept out of the way of the third year. Feeling awful for the trouble he was causing he began to slow down his pace until he heard Noya’s voice.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“ASAHI!” Noya yelled when he noticed him in the sea of people. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>A dopey smile spread across despite the anxiety that had a death grip on his heart. Picking up pace once more, the second thing he saw was Noya’s grin upon seeing Asahi making his way over. More lovely than the sun setting over the valley for which he’s named after, painting the town in wonderful shades of orange and red. He could feel his heart swell as he opened his arms for a hug as Noya sprinted full force into his arms. The third thing he saw when he looked at Yuu was the sparkle in his rich brown eyes, the dilation in his pupils that were so </span>
  <em>
    <span>full</span>
  </em>
  <span> of love. The countless hours he had gotten lost looking at them when a ray of sun shone in them reminding him of the brown tiger stone Noya had gifted him on his birthday. </span>
  <em>
    <span>He couldn’t have picked a better stone for me huh?</span>
  </em>
  <span> Putting him down he took Noya’s hand as they walked out the gates hand and hand to his house. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m serious Asahi, what do you want for your birthday? If I hear you say one more time you don’t want anything I’m gonna rip my hair out.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Yuu, my birthday is weeks away. Besides I already told you I have everything I could ever want. I have you by my side, your love, what else could I ask for except to have you with me wherever I went.” Pulling him in for a hug, resting his chin on his head.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Is that all you want?” He could feel Noya move his head letting out a sigh,”Babe, I love you but you being so cheesy is infuriating right now.” He smiled feeling the chuckles that escaped his boyfriend's mouth. Until realizing that those chuckles meant trouble pulling away slowly to see a smirk. “So you want a piece of me then?” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“YUU!” He could hear the roaring laughter even as the blood began to pound in his ears.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m sorry Asahi, but I couldn’t possibly pass up the opportunity. You’re adorable when you’re shy, I promise I’ll find something perfect for your birthday.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“You’re too much Yuu…” With that they parted ways feeling warm despite the icy air blowing around. He hadn’t really expected Noya to give him something he would truly love as the boy was stubborn enough to give him anything just to show up with something. It was in this moment he could remember feeling the jolts dancing on his skin for the first time.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“This is a brown tiger eye stone...Noya, where did you get this?” Taking it into his palm tracing his thumb across it’s smooth surface.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Do you like it?” He noticed the younger male biting his lip struggling to maintain eye contact.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Yuu...do you know what this stone represents?” Observing streaks of gold and black popping against the rich brown color of the stone. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“That's irrelevant! I want to know if you like the gift...I didn’t know if you’d want a bracelet, a necklace, or whatever else it can be used for so I just got the stone.” Impatience bubbling from the libero staring straight at him.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I love it Yuu. It’s...It’s perfect, I couldn’t have asked for anything better.” Pulling him into a crushing hug, “I don’t know how you managed to do it, but I’m gonna carry this everywhere I go. Thanks Yuu” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“It’s nothing Love, when you said you wanted me to be by your side I figured I’d get you something that reminds you of me. I thought of a lightning bolt keychain but that's more something I’d prefer. Then I thought of a plush but you’re much too shy to carry that around even if you did like it. Then I remember how much you adore talking about gemstones whenever we watch Project Runway talking about how they complimented dresses and themes. So I figured I’d just pick a stone you could keep with you....”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Yuu…” Pulling away, staring into coffee orbs that widened as he rubbed his cheek with his thumb. “I love you” Leaning in for a kiss, capturing Yuu’s lips as the pounding in his chest and the fuzziness in his mind muddling everything. In that moment nothing else mattered, he didn’t need to hear his response as tongues danced, arms wrapping around his neck, and the struggles to breathe. In that moment words weren’t needed to say </span>
  </em>
  <b>
    <em>I love you too</em>
  </b>
  <em>
    <span>, only the actions they shared. Yes, it was that moment where he first felt those butterflies spread their wings and scatter in his stomach. The first time he felt something foreign begin to bloom in his thoughts and in his stomach.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Asahi, we are here.” Noyas voice pulls him out of his trance, sporting a smirk. “What were you thinking about? You couldn’t stop smiling the whole way. I tried to talk to you but whatever was on your mind must’ve been something you </span>
  <em>
    <span>really </span>
  </em>
  <span>love.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I’m sorry Yuu, I didn’t mean to ignore you the whole way” He quipped before bowing.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t mind as long as I’m the reason you have a goofy grin and lovestruck eyes.” Chuckling at his face reddening in response to the teasing. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yuu…what else could I ever think about?” Sighing as he opened the door to let them in. ”Let’s go to my room....there’s something I need to tell you”. For the first time Yuu didn’t tease him for the comment opting to mutter a ‘yes’ following Asahi. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>To say he was nervous was the understatement of the year, he was petrified with every step they took towards the room. The confidence abandoning him being replaced with doubt as they entered, and completely filled him as he locked the door. The room filled with unease as they placed their things on the table. Noya made his way to the bed laying down letting out a sigh of content, the action awakening feelings and desires. He doesn’t know what face he’s making when Noya looks at him and he lets out a gasp. Averting his gaze, he plops down,making himself comfortable on the floor. For a moment no words are exchanged yet the silence couldn’t be more deafening. His shallow breathing began to fill the room as he struggled to find the words he had spent preparing.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Asahi, look at me.” He could feel Noya’s cool palm against his heated skin he reached to hold, ”Breathe. Can you tell me where you are?” Closing his eyes he steadied his breath as Noya cupped his face in turn rubbing away tears he hadn’t been aware were shed. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We are in my room?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What can you see?” He could feel the feelings flowing through him as the amber rays filled the room.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Asahi what are 5 things you can see?” Noya lowered his voice attempting to soothe him. After going through their usual routine when his anxiety would spike he felt grounded once more. “I’m here for you Asahi, no matter what.” Resting his forehead against his, eyelashes fluttering closed with one hand still rubbing his cheek and on his shoulder as support to prevent them from tumbling forward. “Don’t push yourself, we have all night to talk, no need to rush it okay?” Trembling he nodded,”I wanna hear you say it Asahi”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I...I know Yuu” He got on his knees to pull Noya into a hug as he felt the other squeeze him tight. They stayed for what felt like hours till he finally pulled away meeting the other’s gaze soaking the sight before him. No matter how many times he saw those warm colors he swore it felt like the first time. Yuu’s spiky hair with his signature golden streak being complimented by the rosy reds, the oranges that covered his skin, with the pale yellows causing a halo to surround him; he swore that he was the most blessed man in the world. Taking his hands into his own relishing in the moment as he felt a bump against his forehead. Breathing in he could smell the gel that Yuu used to create his signature spiky look and felt a wave of comfort wash over him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hello my Teddy Bear, I’m glad to have you back with me.” Planting a kiss on his forehead they locked eyes, “Feeling better?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yes...thank you so much Yuu, I really needed that”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Anytime Asahi. Listen you don’t need to tell me anything, even if we didn’t go to practice it’s no big deal.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But Yuu-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Asahi, you don’t have to tell me if you’re not ready because I’m sure no matter what it is we can work through it together as always. We are in this together supporting each other as much as we can. You’re never alone even if you can’t tell what’s completely going on.” Feeling another kiss, this time on the lips, he felt the waves come back again as they sat in silence. He took a breath in heaving out as the same fire before erupting in his chest. </span>
  <em>
    <span>I want to tell him, I need to tell him how I feel because we </span>
  </em>
  <b>
    <em>are </em>
  </b>
  <em>
    <span>in this together. We promised to take it day by day sorting things out at our own pace. He’s here for me as I am for him, he always is here no matter what.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I want to Yuu, I need to tell you this” Shocking himself with the determination spilling into him. Nodding his head, Noya motioned for Asahi to continue observing him as he scrambled to get words. “Yuu, you know how I said I was Asexual….”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Of course. You reminded me when we first started to date, and it’s always present when we are testing out boundaries.” He swallowed the lump in his throat knowing it was do or die.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What if...what if I said I’m...n-not sure anymore?” Averting his eyes, he pulled away from Noya opting to sit back down as he fiddled with his fingers.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Asahi?” He heard Noya shift on the bed accompanied by a thump as Noya joined him on the floor. “Where is this coming from?</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I-...I’ve been feeling...weird for a while. I-” Feeling the tortuous heat bursting all over him as he shuts his eyes reliving those moments all over again. “I...I’ve never felt this way before, a-and it scares me but at the same time...it’s pleasant in a way? I’m not making sense I know, I’m just so confused! I-I swear all this time I was sure I was asexual, and I swear I wasn’t..I didn’t mean to lie to you...I-” Feeling something being slipped into his hands, he could feel the smooth stone in between his finger tips.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“You didn’t lie Asahi.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“But I said I was a-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And I said I was straight before, remember?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>Staying silent he began to rub the soothing stone feeling the cool surface against his skin, letting his shoulders relax. He met Noya’s eyes motioning for him to continue with a wave before looking at the stone again. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Remember when we first met I told you I was straight and wouldn’t stop flirting with Kiyoko alongside Ryu?” He could feel a familiar barb of jealousy poke at his heart recalling how his heart sank when he realized his crush on Noya.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Yeah?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“How did you react when I first told you that I wasn’t sure anymore?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“I don’t see…”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Asahiiii please” Stealing a glance at Noya he could see him in the middle of an eye roll as he had crossed his arm shaking his head. “Just answer the question”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Well.” Scratching the back of his neck as he was being transported back in time.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Practice had ended when they were tasked with locking up for the night allowing them to be alone. As they walked home Noya was unusually quiet opting to walk in silence. He was unnerved as the libero always rambled about his day mentioning any interaction with Kiyoko. Worried he had done something to upset him Noya came to a halt spinning around so fast it made him flinch.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Asahi.” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Yes?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“How do you know if you’re into guys?” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>Asahi felt his soul leave his body at the question, as what could only be described as gay panic stopping any thought process.“I’m sorry?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Nevermind.” Turning around he started to walk away.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Noya! I didn’t mean it in a bad way...it's just I thought you said you were straight? Don’t you have a crush on Kiyoko?” Seeing the way he stiffened at his words Asahi tried again, “I’m not saying it's a bad thing if you are into guys Noya.” Stop talking, his mind yelled at him as he mumbled, “I...I think guys are pretty c-cool too.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>This seemed to catch the libero’s attention as he stopped walking, turning to face him. “How did you know you liked dick?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m not gay if you’re asking.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“You like guys only though? You said so yourself the other day, or did I misunderstand you?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Those are different things Noya.” Sighing as he realized he would be home late for dinner, pointing to a bench he motioned for Noya to join him.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“What? Isn’t that the same thing?” Staring at him as he sat down.</span>
  </em>
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“No, there’s a difference between what you asked me and me liking guys.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Uh-huh” </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Let me explain, I am asexual and I don’t feel sexual attraction to anyone.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“But then how can you be attracted to guys?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I’m getting there Noya, but despite not feeling anything in that...way, I do have romantic interest in guys. Think of it like this; I wanna date that person, spend m-my life with them, and act as a couple only I don’t wanna have...relations with them.” Feeling the blood rush to his ears he could feel his heart pounding. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“So like waiting to screw until marriage?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“No. You can’t help but feel no attraction to someone in the way you wanna sleep with them That doesn’t mean you don’t wanna kiss them or hug them tho and...I’m sorry, I’m probably just confusing you more.” Mumbling as he glanced in the other direction scratching his neck in embarrassment.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I think I sort of understand?” Noya resting his chin on his hand, his eyebrows tight as if he were solving a puzzle. </span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Don’t worry about it, um...you asked how I knew if I liked guys?” Getting a nod in response he swallowed,”Well it’s pretty typical but I...I just had a crush in my old school.”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“How do you know if it’s a crush?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“W-Well, it’s just the way you feel towards Kiyoko, only it’s a guy. There’s no difference between liking a guy or gal” Biting down he could feel jealousy shooting through him as he started to wonder if there was a guy that Noya was interested in. Looking to the ground he waited for him to respond.</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“If I do...and let's say I have for a while...am I a creep?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“What?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“I…” Fidgeting in his seat Noya looked down, “I am always hugging them, hanging out with them, and always complimenting them. If I do like guys...does that mean I’m overstepping boundaries because they...they don’t know?”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <em>
    <span>“Of course not Noya! You just said it yourself, you weren’t aware of your own feelings until recently. Even if you were aware, as long as the other person isn’t uncomfortable with the contact it’s fine...you aren’t a creep for treating them as a friend. You hug, hangout and compliment everyone you meet because that's who you are…” He bit back the urge to ask him who the boy was, and if he knew him. “That doesn’t make you a liar Noya…”</span>
  </em>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“It just means you are discovering something new about yourself…”lifting his head up he could see Noya staring back with a fire in his eyes. </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“And what else?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“We can be wrong but we are only human and you shouldn’t beat yourself over something you had no control over.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Asahi can you do me a favor? Take your own advice, and stop acting as though you are some sort of bad guy for having feelings everyone, including me, have.” Going to sit in front of him, Noya grabbed his hand, bringing it up to plant a kiss on it. “Honestly if I hadn’t seen the look on your face earlier, I will admit, I would have been confused as to what you were talking about.”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What look?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Oh? You didn’t think I saw you staring at me with eyes that screamed let-”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“YUU NO!” Burying his face into his hands as he heard laughter fill the room. “You can’t just say those things out loud!”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Why not? I was just answering your question.” Feigning innocence, Noya just batted his eyes at him.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What does this mean then...for us?” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Hm?”</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“What does this change for us...moving forward I mean. Since you know that I…” Gulping hard he felt a playful smack to the back of his head.</span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Like I said before, we will figure it out together, whatever happens will happen. We can just keep testing out the waters like we always do. I may not know a lot about asexuality but you can confide in me as we try to figure out what this means for you. Just as I trusted you when you helped me figure out that I was bisexual, and celebrating when I figured out who I was.” Pulling him into a hug he could feel the love and care Noya held for him.”It’s just not me either, the whole team, even if they’ll tease you at first, will all support you through this. Even if you find out you’re not asexual we will accept you with open arms.” </span>
</p><p> </p><p>
  <span>“Thank you…” They stayed in the embrace till his mom yelled for them to come down for dinner, after sharing a peck, they made their way downstairs hand in hand. No matter what comes their way they are ready to take it on, after all, who could ask for a better partner.</span>
</p><p> </p><p> </p><p> </p><p>
  <span>As Noya predicted, the day he confessed about his questioning he was met with wolf whistles and snickers telling them to use protection whenever the pair was left alone. Tanaka went as far as handing him a condom telling him to be gentle almost making him collapse right then and there. Other than that the team wouldn’t pry into his labels and on occasions shared advice on how they found out what they were, even going as far as to share with him terms they had found while doing their own research. None of them seemed to stick until he came across a list of flags with one titled ‘Demisexual’, it had a similar color scheme to the ace flag but the shade of gray was lighter. Having caught his interest he searched up what does demisexual mean; </span>
  <em>
    <span>Demisexual means one cannot experience sexual attraction without first having a deep emotional bond.</span>
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  <span> Soon he was reading articles, watching videos, and after days he had come to the conclusion that he was indeed demisexual. It explained a few things like how even when in past relationships he never felt attracted to his partners even if they themselves were. How he would catch himself thinking about his closer friends who he got along well with. Even explained why he wasn’t attracted to Noya at the beginning but now being unable to get those thoughts out of his head. Hell that would explain why the tiger stone was a turning point, after all, it had shown just how much Yuu cared for and knew him. He smiled, finally finding a label for himself after being thrown into confusion when he first accepted the desires after pushing them away. Quickly sending a text to Noya he felt a twitch of fear flash but disappeared as fast as it came. No matter what changes they were gonna adjust and continue creating a foundation of trust. After all, in this relationship, it was him and Yuu every step of the way.</span>
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